Moose T-Shirt – Communicating with animals…

November 19, 2012 § Leave a comment

moose  t-shirt

I am a moose and I live in a hoose…

Don’t ever say boo to a moose. Ever. It’s not worth it. Take it from someone who knows. And, in order to remember it, I suggest your frequently don this Moose T-Shirt. Also, it looks awesome.

If someone tries to correct you by saying “No, no, no, silly person, it’s not a ‘moose’, but a ‘goose’ that one should never say boo too” you are allowed to kick them in the shins and stick your tongue out at them. Your basic goose is a slightly chunkier duck with a speech-impediment. Not really much to be scared of there. Whereas a moose is a “deer” on steroids with about half the brains and none of the deodorant. If you go up to one later today and say “boo”, don’t say I didn’t warn you. At best you shall receive a stern admonishment. At worst, you’ll be deaded. In order to keep up the level of public service that this site is renowned for, here are other words that should not be uttered in the presence of, or to, other animals:

• Never say “howdy” to an otter.

• Never say “arithmetic” to a cobra.

• Never finish a sentence with a preposition in front of a lemur.

• Never say “ocelot” to a barnacle (or visa versa)

• Never say “cranberry” to a heron – for this is the deadliest of all.

Remember these simple rules, and nature will do you no ills.

The other way to avoid these problems is to wear this rather charming t-shirt. The design is gentle and humorous, and the colours work perfectly together, especially for autumn. It was designed by Simon Mills for Mild West Heroes and I discovered it on notonthehighstreet.com. It comes in this chocolatey colour and sizes go from S-XL. And remember the old adage “People who live in rural Canada shouldn’t read ghost stories aloud”. Be warned.

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